Do You Love Me That Much? Really?

“You’re here.” My voice cracked. It was almost unbelievable—this earthly reunion brought about by my death. I thought death only brought heavenly reunions.

~from Love Like There’s No Tomorrow

It boggles my mind to fathom all the amazing ways God has blessed me since the cardiac arrest tried to steal my forever breaths.

Friday evening gray rain fell as as Michael, the kids, and I trekked southward to spend a weekend away.

But this wasn’t an ordinary weekend. This time we ventured to see my two beautiful sisters. We’d reunited after my death when they seemed to magically appear in my hospital room after a nine-year separation. Love rose, promises to get together soon, but we didn’t.

And then God opened a door–yes a gateway, a blessing, a pathway–for me to write a book about my experience with dying and the quiet months after…and my past. I wrote chapters about my sisters. Memories flowed, and foggy remembrances cleared into love, surprising me with sweet healing.

As I wrote, I longed to be near my sisters, to reunite again, to talk and laugh and reconcile.

It had been five years since my cardiac arrest–five years since I’d seen them.

But now, here I sat in our green Honda Odyssey traveling through the night while my Michael drove me to see them.

We found the house. We pulled in. I opened the van door, and my sister ran to me. Oh, the joy and the grace that flowed through us.

The next day my other sister came. Tears dampened my cheeks as our arms held each other. “I’m glad to see you” was all I could say.

What a joyous visit! We relaxed together, played games–the sun came out for us! We talked and laughed, ate good food. My sister and my boy Ben played guitar while we sang old folk songs. “Where Have All the Flowers Gone?” “Hallelujah.”

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Abounding blessings.

Writing Love Like There’s No Tomorrow was more than just sharing the story of my life-rattling incident. Healing sprouted from the writing, from the digging, from unfolding my heart. I committed to, with raw honesty, examine the past, pushing through fear of awaking latent pain. I ventured like a fearful child into a dark room only to find when the light shone not a cobwebby cavern, but a room of joy, created to display my Father’s love. 

Reconciliation with my sisters parables just one of the runneth-over cups of grace restorations that blanketed me as I wrote.

Such a healing journey. I’m so grateful to share it with you!

Remember, He loves you like there’s no tomorrow.

Above all, keep loving one another earnestly, since love covers a multitude of sins. (1 Peter 4:8)


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Ocieanna Fleiss